Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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