3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
