omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I think people are normalizing furries
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
