I hate all girls vehemently.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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