now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
