You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
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