It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
