it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
