I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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