i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize