Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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