The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
