belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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