We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize