the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
