Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
