Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
