He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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