But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize