Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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