i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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