Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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