don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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