idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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