i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
