That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
