Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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