You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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