are you still at the devil's house?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
When are your genitals available?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
