Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize