i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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