My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
