walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
