Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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