I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Someone came in the potted fern
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
