her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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