I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
