thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize