I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
