Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Can you bring me the toilet please
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize