I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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