A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize