it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
