margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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