i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
