If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
