drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
