whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
