new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize