come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize