i jhust puked up my retainher.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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