she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
My dick has a subreddit
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
